GOD IS IN CONTROL

That's what I keep telling myself these days...God is in Control!

A lot has happened since the last time I posted on here...where do I begin?

Friday, March 12 we found out we were pregnant, what a surprise that was, especially since it was 3 days before our first home study visit. We were thrilled and felt what a wonderful blessing from God. We had our home study visit and Antioch Adoptions decided it was the right thing to do to put us on hold and later to find out, our file ended up being closed for the adoption process. They told us it was not permanent and we could re-open it back up when the timing was right. We thought WOW how God has changed our direction from adoption and now we were pregnant. We were so excited to see what God had in store for us.

We went to the Doctor for our 12 week check-up, I was very anxious...this is a very "special" period in pregnancy for us, we have had 2 other miscarriages 6 years ago. We knew God was in control and we had to believe that. I will never forget this day, Tuesday, April 27. We came to find out that our little one had gone home to be with Jesus. Our hearts were completely broken. I thought how could this happen to us AGAIN! Why was I being punished? What have I done to deserve this? I will tell you that I have been very angry with God, but I am also very sad and discouraged. I have hidden from my friends and family, I felt like my whole world was torn apart.

It has been a month now...I still think about our baby and what he would of turned out like and how much LOVE we had for him. My Doctor did some testing on us and on our baby to find out if we had a chromosome issue, everything came back normal. Praise Jesus! I have a blood clotting disorder and if I were to get pregnant again, I would have to give myself blood thinning shots. My Doctor told us we could have a "normal" pregnancy.

We have high hopes that one day we will be blessed with a child, whether through adoption or pregnancy. For now, the adoption is still on hold and we are holding on to each other and Jesus, for GOD IS IN CONTROL!

Home Study Scheduled!

Our first home study has finally been scheduled for March 15th! We have been feeling so anxious lately, but we ultimately know that God is in control. He already has our child(ren) picked out for us and when the time is perfect, it will all come together.

I never realized how much of a patience learning process Adoption is. It sure tests your Faith and your Marriage, but when this is all said and done, we will look back and not think twice about all that we have been through, we will be so Blessed!

Praying for God's Perfect Timing

Our homework has been completed and turned in for a month now and we continue to pray and wait on God's perfect timing for our home study to be scheduled. We are so anxious and excited to begin our family. We have prayed and wanted this for so long and one year ago, we didn't think that we would be able to have a family. God opened the doors to Adoption for us and this child of ours has already been birthed in our hearts. We feel so Blessed to be on this Journey.

Homework Completed!!

We finally completed our homework, I can't believe we made it through all this paperwork. We are so close to the end of the adoption process and feeling all kinds of emotions. This has definetly been a "roller coaster ride" for the two of us, but through it all God has been faithful and blessed us immensely. It has strengthened our marriage and our faith.

The next step will be for our Case Worker to review our paperwork and schedule our home study. Then once that is completed, the waiting period begins. We know God is in control and whether we have to wait 3 months, 6 months or 1 year, God's timing will be perfect.

Our Journey Continues...

We finished our classes last night, I can't explain the feeling I have inside, my heart is so full of love and its overflowing for this child we don't even know yet. Tim and I have been praying through this journey and after our class last night it was confirmed over and over again that we are going to work with birthparents, what a ministry we will be able to give to these young mothers and young fathers. We feel so Blessed to have an answer to our prayers.

Homework, Homework and More Homework!

Does this title tell you anything? We are currently working on our homework, who would of thought we would have so much to do in order to adopt. Tim and I both feel this is exactly where God wants us and we wouldn't have it any other way.

We are so grateful for our supportive friends and family, which makes this process easier to go through.

Halfway There!

I can't believe it, we are halfway through our Adoption process!

We just finished our Pride weekend, we learned so much and made new life-long friends. Our next step is to complete our homework, 2 classes left to attend and a home study to prepare for. Our hearts are so full of love and ready to bring our baby home. God never said this would be easy but as long as we depend on Him everyday he will get us through this. We are so excited to see what God has in store for us.